When You're In The Spotlight...

If you've been following the news, you know Ray Rice has been in hot water for domestic violence against his wife. Video surfaced of Ray Rice having an altercation with his woman, and apparently he instigated the fight, she retaliates by spitting on him, then he knocked fire from her. Make it so bad, she's standing by him through this ordeal. She's been accustomed to a good life, so she's not trying to lose it. The shopping trips, vacations, etc. Many women benefit from living lavish off their professional athlete/actor mates, so I guess they feel like it's too difficult to start over by leaving their abusive men. Is staying with an abusive spouse worth the luxury one becomes accustomed to? For a person who values peace of mind, no. For someone who doesn't have much self-worth, yes. It boils down to what a domestic violence victim is willing to put up with. Adrian Peterson got in hot water for alleged child abuse, so the NFL is trying to make an example of him and Ray.

Adrian Peterson and Ray Rice were suspended indefinitely by their respective teams, and I'm sure they lost millions in income and endorsements. That goes to show you that companies place high value on moral character. When you're in the spotlight, you must watch your conduct. All eyes are on you, whether you like it or not. The slightest infraction, it's off with your head. Ray Rice and Adrian Peterson are two of the best players in the NFL, and I hope they learn from their situations. Adrian Peterson got in trouble for disciplining his child due to marks left on his son's body; the kid is 4. Here's my thing: If anyone was raised in a black household, spankings were the norm. Many people were whooped with switches, belts, anything that wasn't nailed down. Black parents aren't about that "you're grounded" life. Many black parents will tell you once, and if you don't listen, here comes the belt. Some black parents will ground their children, but not many.

Everywhere you turn, someone famous has legal issues. At what point do celebrities realize that they're role models, whether they want to be or not? Knowing that, it behooves them to conduct themselves of the highest standard, because as with Ray Rice and Adrian Peterson, there's too much to lose. In the end, it's not worth sacrificing a good life just because your spouse wants to act stupid. I feel like this: If I'm a celebrity, I'm living low key. I don't like a lot of people in my business anyway, so it would be easy for me to stay out of trouble. Too bad many athletes and celebs don't think like I do.

Where's My Queen?

You didn't think I was going to let the fellas slide did you? What's good for one, is good for all. What makes some men think they're deserving of a solid woman? A woman that has her stuff together, grounded in God, and of good moral character would be wise to seek out a likeminded man. An unbeliever and believer cannot be unequally yoked, which extends to character. If a man is ratchet (yes, some men can be ratchet too), why would he think he's deserving of a good woman? He's going to corrupt her because it's said that bad company corrupts good character. Far too many solid women get with some no-good man, he mistreats her and she joins the Bitter Woman Brigade. A good man comes into her life, and he has to pay for what the previous man did. That could've been avoided if the man didn't try to front. Y'all know what I'm talking about: Ever hear of the term Wolves In Sheep's Clothing? That term means a foul person poses as someone of good character to get next to a solid individual. Once that person lets their guard down, the wolf slowly begins to show its nature. The person never knew because (s)he didn't have the proper discernment. Something will always tell you if someone's got ill intentions. You get an uneasy feeling around them, and you scrutinize their every move. What do they see in me? Out of all the potentials, why did they choose me? Those are the questions one must ask.

In conclusion, a woman of good sense would not entertain a court jester. Why would she? To her, a jester would bring down her value. The next time a man asks himself why hasn't he found his queen, maybe he should ask himself if he carries himself like a king.

Boaz Has Passed You By

When I hear a woman say she's waiting on her Boaz, I giggle so hard inside because many women are clueless about the Biblical story of Boaz. Many women assume their Boaz is going to appear out of thin air, but that's not the case. These women don't realize that Ruth positioned herself to be found. She didn't sit on her behind waiting for Boaz to appear, Ruth did the work to put herself in a place where Boaz could find her. Once Ruth found her Boaz, the rest was history. Today's Christian woman has it twisted because they've bought into the same feminist mindset that a man is supposed to wait on them hand & foot, while she reaps the benefit. These are the same women that call themselves Proverbs 31 women. Last time I checked, being a Proverbs 31 woman requires work, and some women today do not want to do the work required to attract their Boaz. They think their looks will get them by, and they will on a shallow man. The Bible says that man looks at the outward, but God looks at the heart. A man of character is going to examine a woman's heart before choosing her as a mate. He realizes that looks can be deceiving. Some of the most attractive women have horrible character (the same goes for men). I have no problems with a woman wanting her Boaz if she's of right character. Those women have every right to desire a Boaz because she's worked on herself enough to where a good man will seek her out. I'm talking about the ratchet women. Those are the types that are quick to say "I'm looking for my Boaz" Well, what are YOU doing to position yourself to be sought? I'll wait.

Do women understand the term HELPmate?

Do women understand what a Helpmate is? The term helpmate is a supporter, someone who HELPS their spouse reach their full potential. Some Christian women have been infected with the same worldly mindset about relationships. Many Christian women are no different than secular women when it comes to their approach in finding a mate. They believe the man is supposed to do all the providing, protecting, etc. True, a man's job is to provide and protect, but a wife is his helper. That means she's holding the house down while he's out working. Too many Christian women want to sit on their behinds and watch Lifetime movies while the children fend for themselves. The husband comes home to find that nothing's done. No hot meal, clean house, etc. What's hilarious is that some Christian women have the audacity to call themselves Proverbs 31 women. A Proverbs 31 woman brings out the best in her man. That requires WORK.

I can't take too many Christian women seriously when they say they're waiting on their Boaz.  "I'm patiently waiting on my Boaz" Boaz has passed you by honey. Ruth positioned herself to be found by Boaz, she didn't sit on her behind and wait for Boaz to find her. She was aesthetically pleasing, and of good moral character. Ruth qualified herself to be found. American women have no concept of being a helper, and I can't blame them for it. Their fathers are at fault for powdering their behinds. These dads raise their girls to be entitled princesses; they don't have to pull their weight in a relationship, a real man will give her everything she wants, and so on. Some of these women grow up expecting a man to cater to them, but some women forget about his upbringing. His mother schooled him to steer clear of women that will take advantage of him. She's wondering why no man is approaching her: Well, men can sense trouble and prefer not to deal with it.

Relationship Contradictions

WOMAN A: Congratulations, girl, you done finally got yourself a good man.

WOMAN B: Oh thanks, he's great.

WOMAN A: So when you and Brian going out?

WOMAN B: Brian, oh no, I'm with another guy.

WOMAN A: Another guy?  What's his name?

WOMAN B: He's known by his peeps as "Butter".

WOMAN A: Oh, does Butter have a job?

WOMAN B: Uh, not exactly, but you usually can find him near 41st and Linbrook.

WOMAN A: OK, so he has a business there?

WOMAN B: Uh, I suppose you could call it that.

WOMAN A: What does he do?

WOMAN B: He's a hustler

WOMAN A: Whatchu mean?

WOMAN B: He sells pills, weed, and zanex.  He make a lot of money though.  He only got caught twice.  He should be OK this time.

WOMAN A: So you turned down Brian for a man who does illegal things?

WOMAN B: It's not that bad, it's not like he's hurting or killing anyone.

WOMAN A: You done fucked up, girl.

WOMAN B: You can't judge him.  Only God can do it.  Anybody can be a dope dealer, even lawyers and mechanics.

Dumb-ass women will use something that I like to refer to as "bitch logic".  They will try to justify their dumb-ass choices by making excuse, comparing them to other bad choices, and............you guessed it, the good ole phrase of "don't judge".

The above conversation was posted in a Facebook group I'm in, and it was too good not to share. Excuse the expletives, but he's right. Some women want a contradiction for a man. He's gotta be smart, but have thug swag. He must be 6'4 with a six pack, and so on. Ladies need to make up their minds. Either you wantt this or that.

Strawberry Letter | Steve Harvey in the Morning on WDAS

Strawberry Letter | Steve Harvey in the Morning on WDAS

 

Another confused woman. She's wondering why her man hasn't left his wife and committed exclusive to her. Newsflash: Just because a man cheats on his wife, doesn't mean he's going to leave her. Matter of fact, most cheating men don't leave their wives because many cheaters are very conniving so their mates won't find out. What's all this love craziness she's talking? He doesn't love her. What he's doing to his wife, he will do to her. That's called the law of reciprocity. I will never understand why some people can't find their own (wo)man. Why you have to take what belongs to someone else? I'll tell you why, because most people aren't confident enough to pull an unattached person. Going further, she really didn't "take" him from his wife, he voluntarily agreed to cheat with this hussy. I'm getting tired of these cheaters; if he's not happy with his wife, LEAVE! He's making himself look like a coward by going behind his woman's back with this other woman.

"I love him, but I'm too old for this stuff" She thinks I fell off the turnip truck, because I'm not buying this garbage. She doesn't love him, and he doesn't love her. She's not too old to mess around with a married man, but all of a sudden she's "too old for the games". When you're on the receiving end of someone's deceit, it's not so fun. Strawberry letters like this are why people need to be very careful who they cheat with. All cheaters start off showing you love, then once time goes on, some of them ween themselves away and start trying to make things right with their spouse. The problem is that once infidelity has happened, trust is hard to regain. In many cases, trust can never be restored. Obviously, he must not love this woman too much if he's still keeping in touch with his wife. She knows what to do, walk away and never look back. There might be a small chance of reconcilation between this man and his soon-to-be ex-wife.

Is A Man Within His Right?

Is A Man Within His Right to get full custody of his children if he feels the mother is unfit? In a perfect world, yes. Given the child custody system is favored towards mothers, it's a given that a father is going to have a hard time proving the mother to be an unfit parent, even if he has a good case. Even though there have been instances where fathers have won full custody of their child(ren), the overwhelming majority of child support rulings go to the mother, because most of the time, the father isn't doing his job. I believe it shouldn't take going to court to get a (wo)man to do their job, that's bananas. When women feel hurt, they can be very nasty. That's why men need to be very careful who they lay down with. You truly don't know someone as well as you think. You can be with a person for years, and NOT truly know them. People aren't going to tell you their bad side, they're only going to tell you their good side because they don't want to run you away. Because many men don't take the time to examine a woman's character, they get caught up in her looks. They see a fine, shapely woman and get to losing their minds. I hate to see good brothers dragged into nasty custody battles because contrary to what society portrays, there are fathers who look after their children, but their nasty mother will not allow the child(ren) to see their father. The mother poisons the child(ren)'s minds into believing that daddy is no good. Unless the child is of age, that child will believe the lies of their mother because she was the one who was there for them since Day 1. Some men need to pray before they lay. If he can't see her as a wife, he shouldn't make her a mother. That will solve many of these custody battles.