Everyone has someone they're attracted to, and want to pursue something more with them. The issue is when attraction trumps wisdom. You ignore red flags and proceed, and when that person's true colors show; you're looking crazy wondering what happened. If you used wisdom, you would have saw the signs. A friend of mine was telling me about this guy she's feeling. They mesh well on some levels, but she can't get past his player ways. He's over 40, and engaged to a fiancee that he's been living with for 10 years, but he's not interested in her. He's checking for other women on dating sites. My friend is somewhat attracted to him because he's got a lot going for him. Through her prayers, he's getting into church and trying to get closer to God, but...he's a porn addict and is shacking. Here's my question: He's been with her 10 years, engaged for 3 and according to him, he's not feeling her. Wouldn't common sense tell him to cut ties with her?
My friend asked him the following question: Do you consider me one of your random Internet hoochies or are we special friends? Anytime you're trying to get to know someone, you don't set up dating profiles and troll for booty. Think about it, you say (s)he's the complete package, so being honesty should come naturally. There's nothing wrong with having a dating profile, just don't lie about it. If my pic circulated over dating sites, and I was trying to get to know a woman, a bulb would go off to let me know that I need to stop trolling for women online and focus on the total package in front of me. Lastly, life is too short to waste years on someone you're not feeling.
There's nothing wrong with being attracted to someone. Attraction + committment will make you work at stuff that should be long over. At the same time, know what you're getting into with a person before you sign on as their (wo)man.
