Mar 7, 2012

Forgive & Forget

No matter who you are, we've all had to deal with forgiveness. It's inevitable that we will be hurt, are hurting and know someone who has been hurt. It's said that forgiveness is moreso for yourself than the other person, which is true. Forgiveness is to keep you free from bondage because holding grudges isn't a good look. Studies show that holding grudges causes all kinds of health ailments so from a health standpoint, forgiveness is beneficial. Forgiveness is one of, if not the hardest things to do because in a way, you have to release someone of the debt (wrongdoing) owed you. I see forgiveness as a green light for someone to keep fouling up intentionally with no remorse. At some point, people need to be chin-checked. Otherwise, forgetting someone's transgression defeats the purpose of having gone through that negative experience. There are times to forgive and forget, and there are times to forgive and confront. The wisdom lies in knowing which is necessary. Realistically, humans don't forget. I can forgive and remember what they did but forget wanting revenge. I will not be a fool and let someone repeat the past with me. Forgiving doesn't mean absolving them of the consequences of their actions, it means you won't allow them to live rent-free in your life. They're keeping it moving and you're holding a grudge. I do realize that some hurts are deep and those take time to get over.

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