Sep 18, 2014

Preachers Of L.A.: Consulting Your Wife

Should a man consult his wife before a decision? Read the following discussion that I sparked on my wall:
 
Why is Wayne shook by Myesha? Come on bruh, you're the head. If you want to move your mom in, that's your decision. ‪#‎PreachersOfLA‬
  • Twanna Gill No... That's something you all discuss and come to an agreement on. Adding someone to your household can change the dynamics of your relationship and not always on a good way.
  • Richard Hudson In the end, Myesha had no choice but to support her husband's decision to move in his mother. Wayne was like "How am I going to break this to Myesha?"
  • Twanna Gill No... that's not how marriage works. That is her home. Their home. And you can't just move folks in, make household decisions without discussing things with your mate. That sets the scene for drama and tension when it didn't have to be that way.
  • Richard Hudson As the head of household, a man must make tough decisions even if the wife doesn't agree.
  • Twanna Gill That means nothing. How would he feel is he came home and her mom was there? He'd feel at minimum disrespected in his home.

    "... forsaking all others..." isn't just about giving up other (wo)men... "giving up single ways" isn't just about monogamy. It's a mindset. No one comes before your spouse and their well being.
  • Richard Hudson That's the issue with marriage relationships as a whole, too many men are scared to take their role as the head. Gotta consult the wife about everything. At some point, a man has to grow a pair and make decisions independent of his wife.
  • Twanna Gill Being the head doesn't mean you do what the eff you wanna do - that means you wanna be single.
  • Richard Hudson Today's women don't understand the concept of standing by their man. A husband isn't obligated to let his wife in on every doggone thing. As long as he's not endangering his family, that's what counts.
  • Twanna Gill No he isn't. But moving someone into THEIR home is absolutely something that should be at minimum discussed BEFORE it happens.

    And... if we taking this into a "traditional" role type sense since you keep mentioning him being the "head". That makes
    ...See More
    4 hrs · Unlike · 2
  • Keisha L Fuqua I agree with Twanna....
    4 hrs · Like · 1
  • Richard Hudson The best way to squash all that nonsense is remain impartial, no matter how difficult it gets. If his wife is right, he sides with her. If the mom is right, side with the mother. No matter what he does, someone will always feel slighted. You can't please everybody.
  • Keisha L Fuqua Which is y mom shouldn't live there.....you can't please everybody
    3 hrs · Like · 1
  • Twanna Gill Exactly Keisha!
  • Twanna Gill As the "head" you don't created crazy situations and after you've created a mess you decided THEN to sit back and be "impartial".
  • Richard Hudson If this were on the other foot, Wayne would be expected to accommodate Myesha's mother with no hesitation.
  • Twanna Gill No. He shouldn't be expected to just accept that either. It's a discussion. Pros, cons, developing a plan together

Tuesday Message: Walking Away From Toxic Relationships

Repost: Shanta Collins  When you fall out with a person They're so quick to  discredit you 🥴Now all of a sudden you hateful, broke, jea...