Aug 28, 2013

Men Could Care Less: By Lotus

 
How to Be a Woman
Ladies,

Most men really don't care how many degrees you have. It does make you valuable to your employer, not as much to your man. If you don't know your role and can't play your position, he couldn't care less. If you're constantly throwing up your degrees in the face of every man you meet, is there any wonder you're single? If submission is brought up, there are women that love to counter and call it slavery. Yet, they have no problem being a "slave" to that career but can't submit to their man. If you are lacking the necessary prowess to be a good mother and wife, how valuable are you in your marriage and/or relationship? Men are interested in what kind of partner you will be. They want to know if you are a nurturing woman capable of embracing your role as the first teacher of the children and capable of properly caring for them. They are interested in knowing if you can take a house and make it into a home. And they need to understand that you can feed their soul with love and nourish their body with a meal. For some, an appraisal is long overdue, because you may not be as valuable as you think you are. The "depreciated value" just might shock you.

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My $.02: It's one thing to be proud of your education, but to rub it in a man's face is lame. Some women have a Master's Degree, but they can't cook. They have a Ph.D in Bioscience, but they don't know what it takes to keep a man. Where they do that at?
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Aug 27, 2013

Janet Jackson-What Have You Done For Me Lately?

 
20 hours ago
 
So many of us as women sound like that classic Janet Jackson joint "What have you done for me lately?".....when the question can be asked what have we as Black Women done for the Black Man LATELY?

When was the last time we showed him support and encouragement?

When was the last time you even OPENED your MOUTH to speak to one as he passed by?

When was the last time the man in your life could see that you love him through your ACTIONS; not from what you profess with your mouth?

When was the last time you asked a Black Man his dreams, and goals, and was prepared to bring them into fruition?

When was the last time you laced your voice with caring instead of contempt?

When was the last time the man in your life ate a meal that didn't come out of a box?

Here is how reciprocity works....whatever you WANT....you must be first willing to GIVE.

And for all those women that say I promote doing "too much" for the Black Man...you will always
find your man "never doing enough" for you...because he doesn't have the MOTIVATION to do so.
 
The last sentence says it all: If a woman finds her man not doing enough for her, he lost his motivation. One can only guess why.

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Aug 26, 2013

My Favorite Tweets

#ICanHonestlySay that America IS NOT a Christian nation. Look at the nonsense going on, and get back with me.

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Stop Being Thirsty: By Trina Rogers

Stop looking so Thirsty. Stop looking so EASY. Stop looking so trashy and find some class about what you do. Let someone WANT YOU, instead of acting like you need them all the time. Let someone meet your standard instead of you lowering yours to meet theirs all the time. Don't allow your loneliness to make you think that every smile someone gives you means that they want you. Never let your thirst... cause your perception to mislabel someone's intention. Learn how to take a compliment without creating SOMETHING in your mind that doesn't exist. Every compliment someone gives you shouldn't make you fall in love with that person. Stop making yourself so available. There's nothing special about being easy access, so stop advertising yourself as wholesale when your value should be something that can't be bought. Everybody doesn't deserve you, so stop giving your heart, your body, your mind, to any and everybody. Just because they tell you the right things doesn't make them the right one. Just because the first date went right doesn't make them wifey/husband material. Stop searching for it, and let God bring it to you. Acting DESPERATE for attention is not attractive. Not respecting yourself for attention is not attractive. Begging to be noticed is not attractive. Insecure people do that. Insecure people want attention, secure people demand respect. Insecure people brag and show off, secure people are humble. Insecure people PRETEND to be perfect, secure people embrace their flaws. There's beauty in confidence, but confidence isn't about showing off what you got, it's more about being secure in what you lack. Thirsty people are addicted to attention and will do anything to get it. DON'T LET THAT BE YOU!!!!
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Aug 23, 2013

GAME: By Lotus of How To Be A Woman

 
    This is too good NOT to share.
 
"GAME"

Ladies,

Some women have a negative connotation attached to the word "game." If a man is so-called "running game" on you, that's perceived as negative. The phrase "game recognizes game" can go either way. And, if someone is "lacing you with game" that's a good thing. Game is, simply put, the skill or knowledge you have or acquire in reference to dealing with the opposite sex. As far as I'm concerned, men as well as women need to have "game." As a matter of fact, women that don't have "game" many times end up with men that don't have any, otherwise known as simps. Simps are not quality men and simps are not leaders. Every male is not necessarily a man and every man is not necessarily a leader. A woman that doesn't have any "game" will not be able to identify a man that is lacking "game." If the man that you are getting to know or have recently began dating does not possess the attributes of a quality man, don't continue with the relationship. Charge him to the "game." This is the exact same philosophy that a man should use if he finds out that you are not a quality woman that doesn't know her role. Ladies, there's nothing wrong with "game" when used in the right way. Having "game" keeps you ahead of the "game" and may prevent you from being "charged to the game."

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Aug 22, 2013

Called To Singleness

 
Genesis 2:18 reads, "It's not good for the man to be alone, I will make a helper suitable for him." I think that's true, for the most part. There's nothing like meeting someone who has your back through the good & bad, someone you can open up to & vice versa. What about single people who DON'T want marriage? I believe God blesses single people the same as he does with marrieds, but there's a special blessing attached to marriage. To paraphrase the Bible, it states "A man finds a good thing, when he finds a wife. The Lord showers him with favor" We all want God's favor, and if meeting the right (wo)man is the way to get it, so be it. I truly feel that depending on the level of your calling, marriage could be a hindrance. There will be times where you must devote more to your destiny, than your spouse. For example, look at President Obama: He's got a family, and he's the commander-in-chief of the USA. Taking care of a family is tough enough, but when you're responsible for running a country, that's another list of challenges; you have to balance the best interests of the country, and those who supported you in the election. I look at Michelle Obama, and from what I see, she has no issue with standing by her husband. Wherever he goes, she's right there with him with their daughters. Even better, Michelle has her own agenda independent of her husband Barack, so it's not like she's stuck under President Obama 24-7. It takes a supportive spouse to understand that it's required to spend a little more time on your calling, than with them. Long before (s)he came on the scene, you had a vision of where you wanted to be in 5 years. When you meet someone that has your back, who WANTS you to reach your destiny, they're a keeper. They understand that you may have to sacrifice time with him/her in order to get where you want to go. Being in the military is another one: You're away from your family up to a year or more. You don't know when you'll see your family again, because of being deployed at a moment's notice. It's said that military personnel have the highest divorce rate, based on the continual absence of one or both spouses. Missing out on your child(ren)'s important milestones: First words, school activities, graduation, etc. Family is important to some people, and they seek out a likeminded spouse. The idea of being away for an extended period of time doesn't cross their mind. Some people understand the meaning of spending time with your (wo)man. Getting to know them on an intimate level. You can't do that if you're not there to invest time with him/her. The greater your destiny, the less likelihood of marriage appearing on the radar.
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Aug 21, 2013

Check & Charge: By Nojma Reflects

Nojma Reflects
about an hour ago
I will never forget a conversation I had with a Sister, that had been a single parent all her life, who stated that she would always tell her son that he wouldn't be shyt. Now he has three baby mamas, lives with her and she helps him pay his child support, but she says he's like that because his father wasn't in his life.

I was like hold up, hold up, and hold up one more time. You, his MOTHER, the woman that bore him, his FIRST teacher, told him ALL his life that he wouldn't be shyt.....it basically became a mantra that you ingrained that in his head, so you predicted what his ain't shyt future would be, groomed him for his aint shyt future....but somehow, it's his FATHER'S fault? I don't know what I found more disturbing: The way she sacrificed her child in order to discount accountability, the level of denial that she displayed, or that the fact that she really felt she was innocent!

Yes an absent parent can make an impact, I can bear witness to that, but what about the impact that the PRESENT parent makes? This example among many others that I could write about is why I do what I do. Our arrogance, gross denial, the get out of accountability aka "victim card" that we automatically dispense whenever OUR WILLFUL actions are put on display, the various shields of deflection we use....I mean it's gotta end somewhere. It has to. Too many of our babies are suffering, being molded in bitter wombs, used as pawns, too many women using their wombs for retaliation, clearly dysfunction breeds dysfunction.

I get all these pleas for balance from women, but yall don't really want balance. I've been accused of being one sided when in actuality, you don't like that I show OUR dark side of the moon. You want some balance? Ok then. Since so many want me to talk about all the ain't shyt men, then it is only BALANCED if we talk about the aint shyt wombs that produced them. If we talk about the doggish men...then it's only BALANCED if we talk about the bitches that bred them, because every dog has a mother right? If you want me to talk about Brothers not marrying women but are sleeping with them then its only BALANCED if we discuss the women that don't MAKE marriage a requirement, but give men the BENEFITS of marriage.

Now how's that for "balance"?
 
 
*All I'm going to say is this: Sister Nojma just checked these deflective women, and charged them with the crime of deflection. Checked 'em and Charged Them.
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Gentle Parenting

  Gentle parenting breeds disrespectful & entitled kids.🤦🏾😎I’m glad I was raised old-school.