Caregiving: Grooming

I'm sure most people that are or have been caregivers to disabled loved ones will vouch for the difficulty. The caregiver has to work full-time: They work from 8am-5pm, then come home to take care of their disabled loved one. They have little free time because their lives are wrapped around the disabled person. There's loved ones that are so disabled that they function at an infant/toddler level, so they need 24-hour care. My heart breaks for the severely disabled because they're suffering. They didn't ask for their predicament, and it's not fair to their loved ones either. Should the severely disabled's loved ones be groomed to take care of their disabled sibling? Grooming is preparation for caregiving once the parents get too old to care for the disabled child(ren). The other siblings are taught home economics so they can take care of themselves & their mentally challenged loved one(s). The other siblings may want lives of their own someday, but some parents place the expectation of caring for the disabled loved one on the other child(ren), so the other children can't have their own lives because it's going to be centered on the disabled person's care. Most siblings have no problem taking care of their disabled brother or sister, but they deserve their own life too. It comes down to family dynamics: If the family dynamics are good, then I'd think that most families wouldn't have a problem taking care of their mentally challenged loved one. If the family dynamics are garbage, then I can see the issue because no one wants to step up and help take care of their mentally challenged loved one. If the disabled person's loved ones won't step up due to poor family dynamics, the only alternative is ALF or a long-term care facility. The problem with ALFs/long-term care places is some of the staff are lazy & underpaid, which leads to abuse, neglect & exploitation of the vulnerable population.