Dec 11, 2013

I Will Not Marry You

Every woman in a relationship looks forward to their man proposing to them. That is the ultimate goal in courting, to lead to marriage. What happens when she says no? That's the ultimate dagger in a man's heart, because he's looking forward to making his fiancee his wife, and she says no. When a woman says no, it could be for several reasons: She's not ready for marriage. Let's be honest, marriage is a big responsibility. You have to ask yourself these questions: 1. Can I love this person past their flaws? 2. Am I truly the (wo)man (s)he is looking for? 3. Will I love them through the rough times? 4. Am I, the husband, willing to seek God for direction for my family? 5. Is (s)he willing to put my desires ahead of his? Those 5 questions are what every couple leaning towards marriage should ask. The answers to those questions will determine the future progression. Oprah is a good example; her and her man live together but don't want marriage. She says she can't live up to the responsibility of marriage, and I respect that. Not everyone wants the responsibility of marriage, but they want marriage benefits. How good is your relationship with yourself? Do you know you? Are you at peace with yourself? These should be the first questions you ask a person when meeting them. If they can't answer the questions, that doesn't necessarily mean they aren't suitable as a mate. Just make sure they have a willingness to figure these things out and go from there. Your purpose might be to help lead them to that peace or purpose. How well one knows themself determines if they're ready for marriage. If a person's used to being single with no accountability, then marriage wouldn't be a good look. They meet a marriage-minded (wo)man, and things are going smooth until the question is popped: Will you marry me? All of a sudden, crickets chirping. Once things are carefully thought out, (s)he realizes they aren't ready to be tied down, so the woman is crushed because he got her hopes up. The moral of this commentary is to know yourself. Know what you can & can't deal with. If you propose to your spouse, and they say no, end the relationship and both of you go your separate ways.

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