Strawberry Letter | Steve Harvey in the Morning on WDAS

Strawberry Letter | Steve Harvey in the Morning on WDAS

Scenarios like this are all too familiar. Best friend gets pregnant by her friend's man, they try and cover it up not knowing that women are investigative by nature. They can sense when something's wrong, and will go to great lengths to find the truth. There's a code that best friends are supposed to follow, and sleeping with one's man is a major violation. I see what people mean by saying that good friends are hard to find, and they are. The letter writer did right by sending her man to live with the cheating witch. Let the other woman deal with the headache, she doesn't need that nonsense in her life. Besides, by sending her man to live with the other woman, that's less drama she has to deal with because it's not like SHE (the letter writer) is going to be a baby mama. Get rid of all toxicity, and move on with a clean slate. Life is too short to deal with foolishness like this. This woman sees the writing on the wall, now it's on her what to do next. I think she should move forward and focus on living her life like it's golden. She doesn't have to deal with baby mama issues, and from her age, she has a lot to look forward to in the future. As for the man, well...he better stack his money as high as possible, because he's going to be taking care of that baby for the next 18 years. He could write another future Strawberry Letter about having baby mama issues, and want Steve's advice as to what he should do. Not much he'll be able to do except man up to what he did, and take care of that child.

Strawberry Letter | Steve Harvey in the Morning on WDAS

Strawberry Letter | Steve Harvey in the Morning on WDAS

The title of today's Strawberry Letter is Doing What I Want, When I Want. This lady has been married 4 times & really wants THIS marriage to work, but her man is showing his behind. He told her straight up that it's ok if he converses with other women, and he does it in her face. I don't know if he's asking for a death wish or he's bold, but if a man is dogging his woman like this man is to her, he must not love her too much. Going further, he cares nothing about her feelings because if he did, he wouldn't be doing what he's doing. Here are the hints: She confronts him when he talks to other women, and he tells her he can lie if he wants to, let alone talk with other woman. He calls her insecure for feeling some kind of way. She has every right to feel some kind of way because she made a decision to marry his sorry butt, and he's going to play her like this. Why did she marry him anyway? Is it because she was so desperate for any man that showed her interest, that she didn't do her due diligence? I'm thinking that's it. It's better to be alone than in bad company. She's already got her bags packed, and ready to leave; I hope she follows through on leaving and never looks back. He disrespects her feelings, he's blatantly cheating on her to her face, and doesn't want to go to counseling. What more clues does she need that he doesn't care about her? I understand her trying to honor her vows before God, but God doesn't want his children abused & mistreated in the name of love. There comes a time where you have to just LEAVE, and don't look back. The longer she stays, the more hurt he's going to inflict on her. She doesn't need that.

Be Yourself

Don't ever be afraid to show who you really are, because as long as you are happy with yourself, no one else's opinion matters.
— Life Facts By Lemon (@lifeandlemon) October 21, 2014

 We've all heard the advice, Be Yourself. That advice is given for good intentions. It's to help us be confident in how we were created, and that the RIGHT people will take notice and want to be in our lives. What happens when being ourselves isn't good enough? We want to be liked by people, and there's nothing wrong with that. What's wrong is compromising your core values to be accepted by people who probably could care less about us. Think about it, people change their views on us like they change clothes. One minute, they think highly of us, and the next minute they dislike us. You can't put too much stock in people, even those who you know well enough that they won't dislike you without a good reason. If you have a bubbly personality with good reason, own that. Don't let anyone stop you from being yourself because they may feel slighted. They don't know your storm; they don't know what you went through to get that bubbly personality on your face. If you're a serious person, own that. Life isn't all roses and sunshine, sometimes you need to buckle down and get stuff done. Like this tweet reads, don't be afraid to show your true self, because as long as you're happy with yourself, no one else's opinion matters. Everybody has a story as to what made them who they are. If you're not feeding, clothing or financing someone, you have little to no say in how someone chooses to show their personality.

Envy: By Joel Osteen

Not everybody will celebrate the favor and blessing on your life. But you have to be wise enough to not lose sleep over it.
— Joel Osteen (@JoelOsteen) October 20, 2014

When someone gets a word from God about their destiny, what's the first thing they do? They tell everyone they know in hopes of garnering support for God's favor & blessing on their lives. The problem is that most people are envious at their core, some people won't tell you because they don't want to hurt your feelings. I can respect that because if you have nothing good to say, don't say anything at all. Nobody has time to be fighting haters, there's more than enough of them to last an eternity. The problem with telling everyone you know about what God showed you is you don't know who's for you or who's against you. Remember, the devil was once an angel so he knows how to entice people into doing his bidding. You may get a few genuine supporters because those are the ones who are real. They want you walking in God's favor and blessing and they will keep you focused. Then you have the snakes, those who slither their way inside, and at your weakest point, they bite. These snakes pretend like they have your back, but they really want what you have, so they feel if they take you out, that blessing & favor is theirs. There are those who will celebrate God's favor & blessing on your life, and there are those who are jealous because they don't have what you as a believer have. Never apologize for being blessed, let alone favored by God. There's plenty to go around, so why be jealous? How God dispenses his blessing & favor is his business, and no one else's.

Led By Emotions

It's best not to go by your emotions & feelings, because they will lead you astray.
— Florida Made (@RichardMIATL) October 22, 2014

I'm a firm believer that being led by emotions can get you in a world of trouble. Why? Because when you're led by emotions, you're not thinking straight. You're so focused on how you're feeling that logic is the last thing on your mind. Women are notorious for being led by their emotions, which gets them in a lot of trouble. She meets a man for the first time, and they're vibing. He makes her feel so good that she doesn't bother to do her due diligence to make sure he's legit. Most men play on women's emotions so that's why he's able to fool some women. All a man has to do is appeal to a woman's senses, and there you go. Men can be led by their emotions too when it comes to getting to know a woman. Because most men focus on her outer beauty rather than her inner beauty, she's able to fool some men. As long as a woman is shapely, throw out due diligence. Never mind that she could have issues from childhood, or she could be crazy. All I'm saying is this: It's rare that your emotions & feelings lead you correctly. Your feelings and emotions change like the wind. One minute you're on Cloud 9, and the next you're down in the dumps. The only example I can come up with that your emotions & feelings would not lead you astray is when you know something's not right. You get an uneasy feeling when you're in an unfamiliar environment because you know something bad is about to happen. You follow your instincts and leave before the foolishness happens. That's an example of your feelings/emotions saving you from drama.

Being Selective

People in general have to do a better job at being selective.

— Lissa Marie (@lissamaries) October 22, 2014

Today's blog message is about selectivity. If you're looking for a job, then you've read the description as to what the employer is looking for. If you're experience & skills are a match, you apply and are called for an interview. The interview is where you showcase what you can do for the company. Whether people want to admit it or not, everyone is selective. Selective when it comes to choosing a mate, car, school, etc. Being selective can be a blessing because you're forced to be very detailed in what you're looking for. You're not looking at the surface, but you're looking at the supporting details that will make up your decision. I don't know about anyone, but I can't afford NOT to be selective. If I'm choosing a mate, I expect her to be detailed as to why she feels I'm the one, and vice versa. Relationships are not to be played with, because a person can make or break you.

If people were more selective, there wouldn't be divorce. I read many articles about couples who used to be on good terms, but they had a falling-out. One person wasn't who (s)he thought, and so on. You can get married with the best intentions, but you truly don't know a person. Couples don't tell each other every thing, some stuff is kept under lock & key. Friends turned enemies, same thing. Gotta be selective in who you call a friend, because some so-called friends are lurking, waiting to turn on you. It takes a lot for me to call someone a friend. I have to feel very comfortable around someone, and we have to vibe in order for me to consider them a friend. Too many people throw the term friend around loosely, when that should not be. "Such and such is my friend," "I've known this person and that person for years," etc. So much pain can be avoided if more people practiced the art of being selective. 

Bearing Fruit

The Bible says you're known by the fruits you bear. The problem is that some women wear tight-fitting attire so you can see ALL their fruit.

— Florida Made (@RichardMIATL) October 24, 2014

Some women complain that men don't respect them. How can a man respect a woman if she has her goodies on display for all to see? You know what I'm talking about: Tight-fitting clothing so you can see her curves. If she's not wearing tight clothing, she's probably wearing revealing attire. If some women don't want to be catcalled, perhaps they should cover up. At the same time, you do have freedom of expression so one should be able to dress as (s)he sees fit, without judgment. Most women will reply with: If he's not buying my attire, it's none of his business what I wear. That's true in theory, but society is relatively judgmental. Judgments are being made every second, from what someone wears to how they act. The only safeguard from judgment is to crawl under a rock, but you'll eventually have to come out sometime. Whether a woman likes it or not, she will be judged on her appearance.

When it comes to "bearing fruit", church women are no better. I've never seen some church women show blatant disrespect for God's house. Yes, God wants us to come as we are, but even that has limits. I was raised NOT to come to church dressed any kind of way: If the young men aren't sagging, then the young women are rocking tight-fitting clothes so you can see all their blessings. Common sense tells you that you're not supposed to have all your stuff on display. You don't know who you may know at church that could work with you, and if they see a woman dressed like she turned up at the club last night, she's going to get a side eye from that visitor. People are watching believers. What they see determines whether they're going to come to Christ or not. If a woman chooses to bear fruit, she should make sure she's bearing the RIGHT kind of fruit. Bearing the wrong kind of fruit could do more harm than good.