If I'm An NFL Owner...

In light of professional athletes messing up their lives, today's blog message is inspired by the recent events involving Ray Rice, Adrian Peterson, and Jameis Winston. Professional athletes feel as though they're above reproach. They do whatever they want without any accountability, and that's not how life works. For every action (good or bad), there's a consequence. If you make good choices, there are good consequences, if you make bad choices, there are bad consequences. It would behoove professional athletes to walk on egg shells because everything they say and do is scrutinized. One minor screw-up, and word will get back to the coach. Jameis Winston is a good example: This kid has done some dumb things from bringing a pellet gun to school to making an obscene statement to a woman in FSU's student union. Coach Fisher benched him for the entire game, so that should tell Jameis that he's not above the team. You can and will be replaced if your conduct is detrimental on and off the field.

If I'm an NFL Owner, I look at everything before I decide to sign players from the NFL draft. Their college stats, leadership ability and their moral character. Very few, if any NFL executives look at a player's off the field conduct. They're worried about their stats. It's good to look at a player's ability to contribute, but their off-the-field conduct is what matters. How are they in the off-season? Do they appreciate the blessing of playing professional football? It's easy to act right when all eyes are on you, but when the cameras are off, that's when your character is tested. NFL players have all this fame and fortune and they don't appreciate it. They throw away fame & fortune over stupidity. Is is that serious to throw away your career over a woman? No. I'm having surveillance cameras, IPhone video footage and whatever else I deem necessary to prove my case, should I find myself in an unfortunate situation.

Being an NFL Owner, I'm looking for the BEST all-around talent: Moral character, their appreciation for the opportunity given them, and are they going to represent me on and off the field. If they agree to uphold high moral values, and contribute to my team, I'm signing them. They can impress me all they want at the NFL Combine, but if their moral character isn't on point, forget it. I can't have players representing me the wrong way as an NFL Owner. That makes me look bad.

Blessing In The Mess

Being a Christian, I hear the term Blessing In The Mess frequently. It means that what Satan meant for bad, God turns it into a blessing. I propose this scenario: A young woman gets raped, and is pregnant by the rapist's child. Rape is a horrible ordeal for any woman, so the last thing she needs is a reminder. The baby didn't ask to be born under terrible circumstances, so it's gotta be rough having to explain the conception to the child. Think about it: Kids are much smarter than adults give them credit for. They're like sponges waiting to soak up knowledge of how life works. At some point, the child is going to ask how they were born, and having to explain that (s)he was raped is crazy. That's a situation that no one should have to experience. Why would anyone want a constant reminder of the horrible ordeal? Any woman would be trying to heal from that, and keeping a rapist's child would throw salt on that wound.

Would I support abortion for a woman who didn't want to keep the rapist's child? Without question. Under no circumstance would I support abortion, but incest and rape are the only exceptions. I realize that I shouldn't support abortion as a Christian, but as stated before, rape would be an exception. No one wants a reminder of their painful past. At the same time, what if the woman got the abortion? That's a decision that carries major implications. Having to live with the decision is to much to have on anyone's heart. Abortion is serious business, we're talking about ending a life. Any woman who chooses this path must be strong enough to live with any regrets & disapproval. Let's say she got the abortion, that's one less CEO, doctor, lawyer, IT professional, etc. that doesn't have the chance to make their mark in society. That's a chance that I'd willingly take because I couldn't accept taking care of a rapist's child. My first thought is retribution on the scumbag who violated my lady in that way.

Master Key

From Khrystle Nichole: People will only treat you the way you allow them to. Don't allow anyone to put their 'ish onto you and blame you for their problems, in person, on the phone, in an email or text. You don't need people like this in your life. Don't hesitate to show them the exit. You are the gatekeeper of your life and you have the master key. Sometimes you have to lock some people out.

She's not lying. There's a saying that you show people how to treat you. If you carry yourself with respect, people will usually give you respect. I realize there are exceptions, because some people are no good to the core. Those are people you don't need in your life because their toxicity will rub off on you. Since I chose to make people earn my respect, life has been good. Gone are the days where I hand respect on a silver platter. The only people that automatically get my respect are my parents; everyone has to earn it. That's all part of protecting your well-being. Some people come into your life as a test. They play on your good nature, and once you let your defenses down, that's when the mistreatment comes. Sometimes, wolves won't show their true colors outright, so you have to be extra careful. I hate to see good people become jaded from letting the wrong people in. If someone wants the master key to your life, make them earn it. Even if they've gotten the master key, always keep a spare so you can lock them out if necessary.

Preachers Of L.A.: Consulting Your Wife

Should a man consult his wife before a decision? Read the following discussion that I sparked on my wall:

 

Why is Wayne shook by Myesha? Come on bruh, you're the head. If you want to move your mom in, that's your decision. ‪#‎PreachersOfLA‬

 @RichardMIATL on Twitter

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  Twanna Gill No... That's something you all discuss and come to an agreement on. Adding someone to your household can change the dynamics of your relationship and not always on a good way.

  6 hrs · Like
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  Richard Hudson In the end, Myesha had no choice but to support her husband's decision to move in his mother. Wayne was like "How am I going to break this to Myesha?"

  5 hrs · Like
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  Twanna Gill No... that's not how marriage works. That is her home. Their home. And you can't just move folks in, make household decisions without discussing things with your mate. That sets the scene for drama and tension when it didn't have to be that way.

  5 hrs · Like
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  Richard Hudson As the head of household, a man must make tough decisions even if the wife doesn't agree.

  5 hrs · Like
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  Twanna Gill That means nothing. How would he feel is he came home and her mom was there? He'd feel at minimum disrespected in his home.
  
  "... forsaking all others..." isn't just about giving up other (wo)men... "giving up single ways" isn't just about monogamy. It's a mindset. No one comes before your spouse and their well being.

  4 hrs · Like
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  Richard Hudson That's the issue with marriage relationships as a whole, too many men are scared to take their role as the head. Gotta consult the wife about everything. At some point, a man has to grow a pair and make decisions independent of his wife.

  4 hrs · Like
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  Twanna Gill Being the head doesn't mean you do what the eff you wanna do - that means you wanna be single.

  4 hrs · Like
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  Richard Hudson Today's women don't understand the concept of standing by their man. A husband isn't obligated to let his wife in on every doggone thing. As long as he's not endangering his family, that's what counts.

  4 hrs · Like
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  Twanna Gill No he isn't. But moving someone into THEIR home is absolutely something that should be at minimum discussed BEFORE it happens.
  
  And... if we taking this into a "traditional" role type sense since you keep mentioning him being the "head". That makes ...See More

  4 hrs · Unlike · 2
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  Keisha L Fuqua I agree with Twanna....

  4 hrs · Like · 1
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  Richard Hudson The best way to squash all that nonsense is remain impartial, no matter how difficult it gets. If his wife is right, he sides with her. If the mom is right, side with the mother. No matter what he does, someone will always feel slighted. You can't please everybody.

  3 hrs · Like
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  Keisha L Fuqua Which is y mom shouldn't live there.....you can't please everybody

  3 hrs · Like · 1
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  Twanna Gill Exactly Keisha!

  3 hrs · Like
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  Twanna Gill As the "head" you don't created crazy situations and after you've created a mess you decided THEN to sit back and be "impartial".

  3 hrs · Like
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  Richard Hudson If this were on the other foot, Wayne would be expected to accommodate Myesha's mother with no hesitation.

  3 hrs · Like
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  Twanna Gill No. He shouldn't be expected to just accept that either. It's a discussion. Pros, cons, developing a plan together

When You're In The Spotlight...

If you've been following the news, you know Ray Rice has been in hot water for domestic violence against his wife. Video surfaced of Ray Rice having an altercation with his woman, and apparently he instigated the fight, she retaliates by spitting on him, then he knocked fire from her. Make it so bad, she's standing by him through this ordeal. She's been accustomed to a good life, so she's not trying to lose it. The shopping trips, vacations, etc. Many women benefit from living lavish off their professional athlete/actor mates, so I guess they feel like it's too difficult to start over by leaving their abusive men. Is staying with an abusive spouse worth the luxury one becomes accustomed to? For a person who values peace of mind, no. For someone who doesn't have much self-worth, yes. It boils down to what a domestic violence victim is willing to put up with. Adrian Peterson got in hot water for alleged child abuse, so the NFL is trying to make an example of him and Ray.

Adrian Peterson and Ray Rice were suspended indefinitely by their respective teams, and I'm sure they lost millions in income and endorsements. That goes to show you that companies place high value on moral character. When you're in the spotlight, you must watch your conduct. All eyes are on you, whether you like it or not. The slightest infraction, it's off with your head. Ray Rice and Adrian Peterson are two of the best players in the NFL, and I hope they learn from their situations. Adrian Peterson got in trouble for disciplining his child due to marks left on his son's body; the kid is 4. Here's my thing: If anyone was raised in a black household, spankings were the norm. Many people were whooped with switches, belts, anything that wasn't nailed down. Black parents aren't about that "you're grounded" life. Many black parents will tell you once, and if you don't listen, here comes the belt. Some black parents will ground their children, but not many.

Everywhere you turn, someone famous has legal issues. At what point do celebrities realize that they're role models, whether they want to be or not? Knowing that, it behooves them to conduct themselves of the highest standard, because as with Ray Rice and Adrian Peterson, there's too much to lose. In the end, it's not worth sacrificing a good life just because your spouse wants to act stupid. I feel like this: If I'm a celebrity, I'm living low key. I don't like a lot of people in my business anyway, so it would be easy for me to stay out of trouble. Too bad many athletes and celebs don't think like I do.