Fast Food, Fast Women

Nojma Reflects

Yesterday

Sisters let look at the correlation between fast women and fast food.

-Both are easily accessible

-Both require little to no effort

-Both are open well after midnight....some are open 24 hours a day

-Neither is good for you physically, mentally, emotionally or spiritually

-Both are very convenient ....all you have to do is "drive through"

-Both are quick and easy to get

-Neither one requires any discipline

A home cooked meal is something that requires preparation, and thought, the spices have to marinate, it has to simmer, it takes time, there is quality in it....after a man has a "home cooked" meal he will understand that one leaves him wanting while the other satisfies his soul.

So Sisters, you can either be viewed as a "quick convenience” or as a "long lasting companion"...the choice is yours!

Brothers......be mindful of who you allow to "feed" you!

My View: Another banger from Ms. Nojma. Every time I read her writing, it's always on point and then some. It's easier to go after something that requires little to no effort than put in work to get what you desire. Fast Food & Fast Women have one thing in common: Both provide temporary satisfaction but you're stuck wanting more and more.

The Reasons Why Men Don't/Won't Get Married

The following is a list of reasons men don't or won't get married according to Jeffrey Green:

A) He is having too much fun being single.

B) He doesn't Want to Be, Nor is he Trying to understand why he should be the provider for a woman who makes more money than Him..

C)First wife took him to the CLEANERS in the Divorce and he never is going to let that happen again, It's not that he is bitter, angry or hurt. Its because, to him its completely illogical and counterproductive in light of all the Things he had to do to recover himself emotionally and Financially to get his life back together, to ever put himself in that position again..

D) He Is 40+ and has his stuff together and he is Looking For a Woman that Matches his Vision for himself at this stage of life.

E)He realizes that a woman wants to and knows how to ride his back, But she can't/won't/don't really know how to guard his back.

F) He is older and accomplished. He likes solitude and views a wife as weakness

*Yah (God) did say it was good for some men not to marry*

My view: All of these are right on target. Some men, just like some women don't want to be married because they don't want to give up their freedom & independence for someone else. When you get married, there's an unwritten rule that states you give up the I's for Us's. That's what most people don't understand. You can't go into a marriage thinking it's all about you. You have to be able to give more than you're getting in return. Let's be real here, sometimes the man is going to give more and the woman is going to give more; no way around it. The problem lies when one person is doing all the giving & receiving; of course you'll have a lopsided relationship. I did a blog commentary on Due Diligence that went into great detail on how to select the right mate and this subject ties into that. If people did their due diligence, they would be able to snuff out those who come to them with their hands out, expecting to be pampered and not having to reciprocate. When a man's been cleaned out by his first wife, he would be stupid to jump blindly into another relationship without doing his homework. Otherwise, what's the point of going through that ordeal? Each failed relationship gives you a greater understanding of what you do & don't want. When one has been hurt by their ex and their relationship ends, it behooves him/her to take some time to work on self BEFORE jumping into another relationship. You don't want to bring old baggage into a new relationship. I say this when necessary: Don't bring your baggage to the terminal, get rid of your baggage before you board the flight.

How I Hurt The Community?

 

As stated before, I've started following Mr. Sotomayor and aside from his rants, this has got to be the realest segment he's ever done. The gist of this commentary is this: If you don't like what Tommy speaks about, DON'T LISTEN! Simple huh? You would think so but some people like his videos and comment just to make him look bad. You have people making fake accounts just to clown Tommy. If you don't like someone, why go through the trouble of making an account just to state your dislike? It's nonsensical. Tommy's haters are giving him more fame, that's the way I see it. He said it himself, "Stop following my page if you don't like what I say. If I'm not doing something you want or like, YOU DO IT!" It's a classic move: Gaining fame off someone else's name. What Tommy does is challenge societal norms he has issues with and I can respect that. Yes, he does generalize at times (we all do) BUT...when you listen to what he has to say, he makes a lot of sense. I will continue posting his videos on my page and giving my own views on the subject matter. That's the beauty of America, if you don't like what someone else is doing or saying, you have your own voice. Put yours out there and gain a fanbase. Problem Solved.

Rapper Rick Ross Caught In Drive By Shooting!

 

The hottest story in the media is the attempted murder of rapper Rick Ross. I don't wish death on NOBODY and I pray that Ross gets some shooters on his team that'll watch his back. At the same time, Ross had it coming because for one thing, he talks about a life he never lived. When you rap about the streets, you better be credible because there are real soldiers that take the thug life seriously. Granted, all rappers probably never lived the street life but I'm sure nobody has tried to take them out. Ross needs to lay low for a while but knowing Ross, he's not going to let fear creep in his heart. I respect Ross for making it out of the hood and giving back. Not many brothers are blessed enough to leave the hood. It is my understanding that Gangster Disciples are upset at Ross for mentioning Larry Hoover and are demanding he cut them a check. I'm glad the shooters missed, but next time they might not. My thing is, if the gunmen aren't caught quickly, they will try to finish the job.

Coach Carter

Coach Carter is a GREAT movie. Every time this movie comes on, I see it because to see those young boys evolve into responsible young men is awesome. It's based on a true story about real life coach Ken Carter benching his team for poor academic results. His rationale was he wanted students to understand there's more to life than basketball. At first, the students rebelled against him but throughout the movie, they respected Coach Carter because he didn't waiver in his conviction. During the school board hearing where parents and faculty had to vote on whether to end the lockout, Carter did have two people backing him, but the others voted to end the lockout. When he said, "If you vote to end the lockout, you don't have to fire me; I Quit!" It takes guts to stand behind your beliefs even if you may have to walk out. Not many people have that strong conviction. This movie is indicative of many inner-city communities, where students put more focus on sports than academics. If you are athletically gifted, then you should milk that talent. Only the very elite make it to the NBA, NFL or major leagues in baseball; then what? You have to have a Plan B. A touching scene in the movie is where Timo Cruz's (Rick Gonzalez) cousin Renny is shot and Timo rushes over to comfort him. Timo goes to Coach's home and breaks down, saying he wants to get back on the team and Coach lets him back.That was a near death experience for the team because the shooting happened right across the street. That's support when the community is willing to overlook your poor academic record and focus on your athletic gift. Coach Carter had a brick thrown through his window at his shop and someone shouted "Open up the gym, let the boys play". For me, true support would entail me having poor grades and getting the help needed to get back & stay on track. 

Deflection-Pt. 2

One thing I detest is deflection. Deflection seeks to take the focus off that which needs to be fixed. Deflection wants to blame everyone but the perpetrator (points to self). It's his/her fault, they didn't do this, they didn't do that, etc. Deflection shifts focus from the real issues; it often looks for an OUT, it tries to change the subject especially when there's no real substance or merit behind a position one might take. It usually takes the ""NOT ALL OF US ARE THIS WAY TONE"".....""ITS JUST THE TYPES YOUR AROUND RHETORIC"".....""THEY HATE THEMSELVES AND THEIR MOMS" RHETORIC"". This is the big one: IT ALSO SEEMS TO WANT TO ATTACK ONES CHARACTER AND SEXUALITY....""HE CONFUSED....HE GAY". It's comical to me because with all that deflection, people make someone's case every single time. I understand truth is not easy for some people to take because they're not used to it. They get around people who powder their butts instead of telling them what they need to hear. When I was coming up, my parents didn't hold back on me. They told me straight up what I needed to hear and I can respect that. It kept me from getting jammed up. I would think some people respect honesty but with deflection being an epidemic, I can't tell. Sometimes I want to be told what I want to hear, but that doesn't mean I'll get it. Most people care enough about someone to tell them the real, which it may hurt for a moment but in the long run, will keep them from destruction. I'll take the cold, hard truth any day of the week; but that's just me.

Going Hard For What Matters

I'm a firm believer in that people only do their best at things they truly enjoy. It is difficult to excel at something you don't enjoy. Think about it, why would you give your all to something (or someone) you aren't passionate about? Doesn't make sense. The energy spent towards meaningless requests could be energy spent going after what's important to you. I'm the kind of person that I put my all into things I'm passionate about. It doesn't mean I won't become weary, it means I need to refuel from time to time so I can keep pushing towards what I want. Everyone is like this, but I make no apologies for being this way. Why would I? I have a passion for something and I will put my all into it. Period. I don't want to have any regrets like some people. I see some people who are on their death beds with a lot of regrets about not focusing on what matters and while I do feel bad for them, I also have to think did they have a clear vision? Were they willing to say no to unnecessary things. Chances are, the answer is no. You have to do what's best for you, even if it means others may not understand your rationale. It's not for others to understand why you focus on important matters. That's called efficiency, focusing on what counts. I feel if people focused more on what matters than trivial things, they would get further in life. Look at the most successful people, they got where they are because they focused on what mattered (and still do). They didn't waste time on trivial pursuits, they had a clear focus of what they wanted to accomplish and went hard for what matters.